House of the Dead: OVERKILL – Motherfucking MOVE Edition

I recently got a PlayStation Move, and I’m excited because I can finally enjoy hardcore games like House of the Dead, Dead Space: Extraction and Resident Evil: Chronicles. Oh wait, I’ve played all of those. Nevertheless, I picked up a copy of House of the Dead: OVERKILL Extended Edition, because the game is amazing and I had to play the extra levels. Also because it was $10 at Big W.

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I wish the TAKEDOWN kickstarter failed

With the successes of Double Fine’s unnamed adventure game and Wasteland 2Kickstarter is the current darling of the independent gaming community and ‘crowdsourcing’ the hot new buzzword being thrown around by insufferable energetic web 2.0 conmen. Kickstarter hasn’t always been a success though, my favourite unfunded project being the criminals who developed Tony Hawk Ride failing to fund some marble madness clone they wanted to inflict on us. If only the same could be said about smug upstart Serellan’s lame sounding tactical shooter TAKEDOWN.

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I am SICK of this CASUAL BULLSHIT

All I ever hear these days is “casual this” “casual that” and they’re always talking about the same thing; Nintendo. There is NO SUCH THING as casual and hardcore, there is no distinction, you guys should shut up because no one is listening to your nonsense. What like Mario Kart is casual now? Didn’t anyone inform the guys slaving away for the continental time trial charts? Halo is hardcore? Why do I find people who know nothing about games know about Halo? Your distinctions are fucked. RPGs are hardcore? My Grandmother, who is arthritic and 84 years old LOVES RPGS because they don’t require any dexterity from her and she can just enjoy a fantasy epic. She plays them on her PS2.

‘Casual’ is just the new word losers use to malign Nintendo. They used to use the word ‘kiddy’, remember that? “Oh Nintendo is just kiddy crap, get a PS2 for real mature games where you shoot guys.” Of course they can’t use kiddy anymore now that their aunt owns a DS the television is saturated with advertisements marketing Wii at adults. Not the so called ‘mature,’ 15 year old boys, but directly to gen X and baby boomers. ‘Casual’ is the new ‘kiddy’, just like ‘mature’ was superseded by ‘hardcore.’ But there is an actual word that all these clowns mean when they say hardcore or casual or mature; ‘Cool’ and ‘Uncool’. That’s what you mean. Wii Play is ‘uncool’.

The real question is; why dont the idiot legions of the internet, the soldiers in the trenches of the console wars use the words cool and uncool? Because deep down, they know they’re losers and there is nothing cool whatsoever about video games. The guy talking at a party about Fallout 3 isn’t the life of it. Guitar Hero champions aren’t going to be doing ads for Pepsi. And now they’re threatened because actual cool people are getting into games, casual games.