Playing Smash Bros with items turned off doesn’t teach you about life

There’s a correct way to play Smash Bros; 4 players, timed match, 2:30, items on, stage hazards on, random stage select. Any other way is wrong. This setup not only creates the most volatile and chaotic matches, but also the ones most likely to see the best players thrive. As anyone who has made it past the third grade of school knows, life is unfair. So why should your video game be any different? Smash Brothers teaches you how to cope with unfairness, how to handle chaos and how to seize opportunities to get ahead in life. Playing stock matches, without items creates not only a saccharine gaming experience, but also a generation of gutless imbeciles. Disagree? Well keep reading to find out why you’re wrong.

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Splatfest – Heroes and Villains

I just wanted to feel something. The Heroes vs. Villains Splatfest seemed like a no-brainer to me at first. I try to be a good person and Nintendo’s Smash heroes are some of the best role models a person can have. What does it mean for us though, to be “good” in a videogame that is about winning and splatting people? You’re always going to be a villain to somebody. Even the person of purest intentions is going to do something wrong or be misunderstood at some point, so I decided to cut my losses and pick the Villain side from the get-go.

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New 3DS – New Review

After my descriptive hands on at the EB Expo, you want more? Well alright. I got a New 3DS for myself at the end of last year, so I’m in a slightly better position to talk about it now. Living in Australia, I had the privilege of picking a regular sized New 3DS model on a regular Monday in 2014, in a regular Target store. XL was an option, but it’s just a personal choice for me to not have a gigantic screen on a handheld. This is my second 3DS since my launch model in 2011 so the upgrade was a big deal. Since I’ve had it for about a month now I feel I can give a fair assessment on how it handles and how my gaming experience has changed. Let’s start with the very first moments, as I invite you into my New 3DS journey.

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