From Chat: 9 minutes in Hyrule

Pro was sampling some Legend of Rehash 3D during a chat. Somehow, old gaming led to current events.

Pro Daisy: ok, Wind Waker’s most important innovation is the R-trigger block pull
Pro Daisy: none of this climb/grab bullshit
Pro Daisy: uh oh, link is in the garden, CALL HOMELAND SECURITY
Bill Aurion: haha, yeah, climb/grab is annoying, particularly when you are in a hurry (after hitting a timed switch)
Pro Daisy: castle courtyard
Pro Daisy: this is my big chance
Pro Daisy: to kill zelda
Pro Daisy: if i kill her now, none of this Celda, this Waggle, this Wii would’ve happened
Pro Daisy: change the course of history forever
Bill Aurion: can’t change DESTINY
Pro Daisy: how did i get past the guards? fake ID and shoe bombs
Pro Daisy: this scene in the courtyard with zelda… has huge significance in the industry
Pro Daisy: i bet this is where many future game designers began their “games are art” erections
Pro Daisy: “I am Zelda, Princess of Hyrule. What is your name?”
Pro Daisy: “…”

Pro Daisy: “Strange… it sounds shomehow… familiar.”

“You saw our E3 presentation?”
Grubdog: the triforce of KICKIN ASS
Grubdog: the triforce of TAKIN NAMES
Grubdog: the triforce of MAKIN GAMES
Pro Daisy: !!
Bill Aurion: the triforce of NOT LOCALIZING GAMES
Grubdog: thats covered in #2
Bill Aurion: HRRRRN

3DS Impressions – Unbiased

I’m sure you’ve read nothing but positive impressions about the 3DS, but they are all lies. Nintendo 3DS is the biggest scam of all time, lies based on hype, fueled by lack of information and deception on Nintendo’s part. All these websites have been tricked by Nintendo into thinking the 3DS is something it’s not. There’s a very good reason Nintendo has been hiding the 3D screen and not allowing photos, and only letting people play the system for a pitiful amount of time. They are forcing people to fill in the blanks with their own wet dreams, when in actual fact, the system has nothing interesting to offer. It’s nothing more than Nintendo propaganda, and journalists are falling for it left and right. Our sites very own Grubdog even forgot to mention that he attended the event wearing Nintardo fan goggles. They probably had screenshots of OoT taped on the inside. Wow, it’s popping out of the screen! Nintard. I decided to attend an event too, and now i’m here to give people an unbiased look at the new Nintendo.

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3DS Impressions – Myer

Myer in Australia held a 3 hour demonstration of 3DS on Thursday for the public, and I was lucky enough to get there in time to play it. The line was huge: when I got there I was number 242 and had to wait an hour to get to the front of the line. It curved around the store into obscure aisles and I spent half the time looking at backpacks and Lego. Then I got 15 minutes to play a few games on the system and it was definitely worth it.

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Nintendo 3DS? Does anyone care?

Nintendo are in a state of fear, the complete destruction of Nintendo DS last year at the hands of PSP has backed Nintendo into a corner. PSP was the highest selling system of 2010, and also had the highest selling Monster Hunter game. The overwhelming presence of iPhone and the looming danger of the mighty Playstation Phone now have Nintendo scrambling around hopelessly in the dark. Nintendo crapped their pants, and 3DS is what came out. This mere evolution of DS, with it’s ridiculous gimmick attached, will be completely forgotten by the end of the year, and here’s why.

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