A fellow user by the name of Travis Touchdown on VG Facts recently brought to my attention and others this fan comic.
Besides the not-so-obvious fact this is a Metroid comic strip, that is Samus with a punchline that makes absolutely no sense, but the comment she makes Samus say at the end is actually hilarious, in a “god you are a dumb ass.”
The two images (which the artist redrew in their own style) of Zelda from Breath Of The Wild are somehow evidence Zelda is somehow another crying princess that has to be rescued. I don’t know how many of our readers have played through Breath Of The Wild yet, so major spoiler warnings after this paragraph, because I have to break down why this webcomic author is a fucking moron.
Once you unlock the camera rune for your Shiekah Slate, twelve pictures show up in the album. These pictures cannot be deleted, and according to the story are pictures Zelda took herself. These pictures serve the purpose of detailing the story of Link being Zelda’s appointed knight one hundred years before Calamity Ganon destroyed Hyrule and turned it into the in-game world you explore. Because Link in present time is suffering from amnesia, he doesn’t know who he really is in-game.
Hence where the memories come in.
Scattered throughout the game map are glowing points, which if you find them, Link will suddenly remember a memory based on the environment that matches the picture in Zelda’s album. These memories can be found in any order, but they actually have a set sequence and show off how Zelda and Link’s relationship developed in the past. Over the course of reliving Link’s past with Zelda, we learn the following:
- Zelda is at first jealous and bitter of Link due to Link reminding her constantly of her own failures, something Gerudo Champion Urbosa makes mention of twice in the memory cutscenes.
- Over the course of the memories we see her start to warm up to Link and in only one memory Link rescues her from the Yiga.
- She is constantly trying and failing to harness the ancient power sleeping within her due to her being a descendant of a princess with a golden power.
- The scene of her crying has nothing to do with her being kidnapped. Calamity Ganon launched a surprise attack that caught everyone off guard, cursing the Guardian robots and Divine Beasts, killing the Champions, destroying Hyrule and killing her father. This makes her feel like an absolute failure, as she feels directly responsible for failing to prevent the Calamity from reviving.
- She literally self-sacrifices herself to keep Calamity Ganon at bay for over a century. While your objective is to rescue her, she is actually keeping Ganon at bay while you are farting around Hyrule.
I know it sucks Metroid seems to becoming a less important Nintendo franchise to Nintendo, but in all honesty there is nobody to blame but the fans. Besides losing their absolute shit over Other M and not letting it go even now, their reception to Federation Force which included a cancellation petition and harassing Next Level Games, to propping up a fucking fan game remake that took a decade to make, it feels like Karma. And as well know, Karma can be an absolute bitch.
It says something when Fire Emblem, a Nintendo series which was planned to be put on ice if Awakening didn’t do well, is now a more recognized franchise (despite the cries of censorship) with the upcoming remake of the second Famicom game, Fire Emblem Warriors and a newly announced Switch title. So really Metroid fans, you need to stop being so terrible and short-sighted, because Nintendo knows you exist and is now leery of touching Metroid.