Resident Evil: The Mercenaries 3D – Anxiety On the Go

After getting back into Resident Evil 4 it was just silly that I hadn’t played Mercenaries 3D yet. This game takes the tried-and-true Mercenaries mode from Resident Evil 4, 5 and 6 and makes a full game out of it. Dropping the need for a single player campaign, it features dozens of missions that are designed to flesh out the gameplay with no context other than “training”.

mercs3dtitle

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Resident Evil 4 – Wii on Wii U Edition

leonhunnigan

*tch* This is Leon. I’ve arrived on the Wii U through the Virtual Console, some kind of digital download service. They took a sample of my blood and uploaded it. I’ve also been injected with a virus, it seems to have changed my reflexes. I can see a green cursor wherever I aim my gun. It seems to be beneficial so far, but I’ll keep you posted on any adverse affects. Leon out. *tch*

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5 Easy Steps – How To Fix Resident Evil

I’ve just finished playing Resident Evil 6 and after some very bad first impressions, the full game turned out pretty decent. Leon’s campaign was extremely enjoyable and the game does a lot of things right as well as wrong. The game has some interesting scenarios, amazing bosses, great dialogue (by cheesy RE standards), and even good music. One thing I really love are the environments, they are unbelievable to walk around in. The streets of China have ridiculous detail as does almost every area in the game, and there’s some nice unique scenes to enjoy and bask in. I had a lot of joyous moments simply moving the camera around and looking at all the unnecessary detail in every corner. Furthermore the gameplay is extremely robust, and the controls are a good refinement of Resident Evil 4 and 5’s strengths. I think in terms of game mechanics, this is the best Resident Evil to date.

However the the more detail you have, the bigger the mess when it all falls apart, and the things the game does wrong are big enough to kill the mood. While the shooting mechanics are good, they are abused far too much. I simply don’t like shooting games. As a Resident Evil fan, I shouldn’t have to know how to play Battlefield. I’m tired of shooting and after Chris’s campaign I need a break from the sound of gunfire and explosions for a good month. The pacing is relentless and ridiculous, if you can even call it pacing. People troll the game a lot and it’s very easy to criticise, but the significant thing about all these bad changes to the series is they are simply design choices. Resident Evil 6 could have been AMAZING if somebody stepped in and said “this is a bad idea”. In this hypothetical article, I am that guy.

re6teatime

Capcom has invited me to their development offices to flip tea tables over, but I can only destroy 5 of them. These are the tables I would flip.

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Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate – Zinogre Is A Dick

MH3 U

I am now at the sixty hour mark in playing Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate, an upscaled version with extra WiiU bells and whistles. In hindsight, it looks like an upscaled game, but compared to the Wii version it plays a lot better thanks to the Game Pad. Yes, as someone who bitched out HD Collections in the first episode of Pie Radio, I actually have found an upscaled HD game I like. However, Monster Hunter 3 U is a game that requires dedication, patience and an urge to tackle fierce/douchebag monsters while at the same time harvesting materials to make stronger armor and weapons. Its not perfect, buts its incredibly addicting and easily one of the best WiiU multiplayer games on the system now (before Mario Kart 8 comes out). Continue reading “Monster Hunter 3 Ultimate – Zinogre Is A Dick”

Be very quiet, we’re huntin’ MONSTERS…

So with Capcom finally wising up and allowing Americans to play with Europeans/Australians, we can finally make Monster Hunter an official Pietriot co-op game.  Unfortunately the update for region-free online won’t be up until next month, but until then, Pro and I have been having a little fun on our own.  Enjoy our antics, and if you like what you see, get the game!

Resident Evil Revelations Demo – Impressions

The first big 3DS demo has hit the eShop, and it’s a brand new Resident Evil game. F**king awesome way to kickstart this service, I’d say. Since the game is free, hopefully most of you have already downloaded and played it. Here’s my thoughts after a few playthroughs.

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Spyborgs

If there’s one thing every video game could be improved with, it’s mayor Mike Haggar from Capcom’s very own Final Fight. Even the crappiest of games would become instant stunner deals (Streetwise never happened) with his inclusion. Just… pile-driving everything non-stop. For example, imagine Data Design re-releasing Billy the Wizard as Mike Haggar the Wizard. He’d spin that entire castle right into the Earth’s core, before beating up on some garbage bins to restore his stamina with filthy, discarded roast chicken.Sadly, Spyborgs has a distinct lack of Haggar, but it is at least in the same genre as Final Fight. Side-scrolling beat ’em ups are a rarity in this day and age; especially ones that actually make it to retail. This final product is actually nothing like Bionic Games’ original vision for the title. It was initially unveiled as a ‘comedy’ adventure inspired by early 90s cartoons and what looked to be rather large bags of steaming horse urine. Thanks to a huge amount of internet backlash, Spyborgs’development went into chaos and somehow mutated into this no-nonsense, bog-standard brawler.

There’s a story, but it’s not very important and rarely ever gets in the way (this is a good thing). Essentially, someone’s being a dickhead and it’s up to the remaining members of the ‘Spyborg Initiative’ to save the day. See, just how much cooler would that have been as the ‘Haggar Initiative’? You better believe there’d be chest hair everywhere. Alas, there are three characters here, each with their own strengths and weaknesses (urr hurr no way) – a quick but fairly weak ninja, a slow but insanely powerful robot, and some guy with a gun fused to his arm to impress the ladies. While Spyborgs is best played with a friend in co-op, each stage will always have two of the three playable characters in action during single player. The CPU does its best to help out as the second player, and you can freely switch between the two at any time.

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The Capcom Five – Video Memorial

NEVER FORGET

Before they cancelled Mega Man Legends 3, before they ignored Wii Pointer controls in Monster Hunter Tri, before they rewarded Resident Evil fans with rail shooters, before Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop could handle 6 zombies at once, before they announce Resident Evil: Revelations including the free Mercenaries HD for PS Vita launching simultaneously with the 3DS version (hi-ho 2012 release date) – Capcom presented… THE FIVE.

Never one to forget 3rd Party achievements, I put this little post together to help last generation’s players and this gen’s newcomers remember the pain for years to come. Actually, before rambling about the quintet’s history that everyone’s heard before, I want to bring attention to the titles as they were announced: by sharing nice-quality versions of their debut trailers (well, 4 out of 5 of them). If we’ll remember ANY of it, let’s at least see clean copies of them; one last face-to-face before closing the casket. I know you can search for the moldy Flash videos originating from Matt C.’s IGN, but try to have some respect for the departed. Those videos came from a time when magazine, internet, and even Nintendo’s own coverage made “good” GameCube games look crappy.

Tracking down known copies of these trailers a couple years ago took some time and $rupees$. My search was narrowed to a couple auctions for rare promo DVDs from Japan, eventually making some sellers very happy. In addition, I managed to gather almost all the promo videos for these games since their announcement. One last step (took forever), each video was processed piece by piece – deinterlacing, cropping out blank borders, scaling the frames for consistency – whenever reasonable, trying to help them look their best. It’s only these past couple months that I seriously sat down to finish converting this junk. When hobbies start to feel like work… I tend to avoid them. Recently feeling an urgent sense of justice, I could delay no more.

So here’s what I got: a few custom screencaps, my personal thoughts/description of each game at inconsistent degrees of relevance, and links to the DivX-formatted media on my homepage. But seriously, I went overboard, so don’t read all of it.

This first one up was the first one to go down

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