Astral Chain – Odd Jobs (Walking the Beat)

Hi. My name’s Grubdog, but you can call me Grub. As everyone knows, redshift matter is threatening to end civilisation and monsters known as chimeras are ravaging Earth. It’s an important issue but someone still has to do the everyday things. We have built a nice little place here on the Ark and I’m gonna make sure it stays that way.

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Star Fox Zero – You’re Improving, Fox!

It’s been a crazy few weeks. After my excited 5 hour impressions, I have 100% completed everything in Star Fox Zero. I have all 70 medals and have beaten all 19 paths in Arcade Mode. So has the excitement worn off? Fuck no. It has gotten better every time I’ve played, like I am ascending through the fighter pilot ranks. I’m now shooting things off-screen without even thinking about them. I’m casually dropping missiles below the TV for group combos. I’m flying through a giant robot’s legs and transforming while aimed upwards so I can land on a tiny platform above its butt to reprogram it before it turns around. This would not be possible without the new control scheme. I’m going to use this review to explain how this game is impossible without the Wii U, not because of “forced waggle” but because the level design takes advantage of it. There is a TON of brilliant design in this game that casual players (game journalists) will never see, and hardcore players NEED TO FUCKING KNOW ABOUT.


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The Wonderful 101 – Can You Handle It?

UNITE UP, gamers! No, not for a fan campaign. Not for a region-locking protest. To SAVE THE WORLD from the forces of evil! Wait.. come back! I can see you all running away from the screen. The Wonderful 101 is that kind of game, it elicits of strong response whether it’s excitement or discouragement. You just have to tell people how uninterested you are because the concept slaps you in the face and demands an answer. You have a choice here, to buckle up and save the world OR keep walking and hope someone else does it. This review will find out what kind of person you are.


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I’m embarrassed to be a gamer now.

It has been quite a wonderful couple of days.

Not only did Nintendo have its WiiU conference in North America and two Nintendo Directs for Japan and one for Europe, but this is quite possibly the BEST console preview I’ve seen from them in years. There was no gaming media bias, no shoddy camcorder work, it was you, Iwata and your computer screen. Nintendo Directs is Nintendo’s own personal way of delivering news, and I couldn’t love it more. Continue reading “I’m embarrassed to be a gamer now.”