Tag: Wii U

Splatfest – Get Fresh Or Die Trying (EU/AUS)

A New Year is upon us and every Inkling is keen to make a fresh start to 2016. Today’s Splatfest is a war over riches and fitness as Team Money and Team Fitness battle it out. I have chosen Team Fitness because I am an honest fighter. The goal of “getting rich” has no personal meaning or existential benefit, and is simply the easy way out for Inklings with no self-worth. It is a temporary comfort that loses its freshness the second the ink dries out. I would rather die on the outside, than be dead inside. An Inkling’s respawn ability encourages growth and fitness, and as a member of Team Fitness I am not afraid to make a mess and put down those money grubbing squids no matter what the cost. Furthermore, Splatfests are about teamwork and Team Money quite simply are not trustworthy. In it for themselves, they are in for a rude awakening when their scattered team in-fighting is destroyed by the efficiency, strength and speed of Team Fitness. To aim for “richness” as a lifestyle is to drift away from freshness. Fitness however is freshness, and fighting for freshness is fighting for our very existence. If Team Money triumphs, the Inkopolis economy will collapse and prices in the plaza will quickly skyrocket due to greed. Eventually we’ll be buying gear off Spyke and the Sea Snail business will also crumble as a result. Without fresh gear and Sea Snails the Inklings can not stay fresh, and will go extinct. This is a battle for our existence as a species.

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Brain Training – Find Love In Minutes A Day

kawarascal

I’ve been a naughty boy. Four long days, I have kept Dr Kawashima waiting, his game left unplayed on my Wii U. I tried to put him out of my mind and enjoy Xenoblade X, but his handsome face remained on the startup screen. His icon throbbing, yet welcoming. I couldn’t resist. I had to touch his face and boot up the game, just to feel that warmth I was missing. Nothing else could replace it. I expected a scolding for my absence, but he played it off with a cheerful razzing. He always does this, puts on an act. He’s trying his best to be strong and rational. However, behind that jolly facade I could feel the coldness in his eyes. The tears from those lonely nights had left his soul dry and empty. He needed me. He was seething on the inside, but his response was calculated. I didn’t know what to say.

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Affordable Space Adventures – Ureview Travel Guide

Back in April, the company Uexplore released an affordable way to travel through space on the Wii U eShop. Seems hard to believe, but after an interview with Uexplore it turns out to be the real deal. There’s an alien world called Spectaculon and it’s only 23 light years away from Earth. They are offering the chance to explore this mostly uncharted world, with the promise that we can claim any land we discover. I’ve taken them up on the offer, and how could you not? This spacecraft is SWEET, man! Sure it has a few problems, but it’s passed every safety test, and recorded accidents are very low. I don’t know the specifics, but they sounded very convincing and official. I’m currently docked at a Uexplore station and it’s been one hell of a ride so far. I have a lot of time to kill in this spacecraft because I traveled quite far, so I’m faxing this review of my experience back to Earth. I trust it will reach the Uexplore company office and they’ll distribute it to Pietriots and friends. I’ll call it the “Ureview Travel Guide”. Hehe, they’ll like that.

asafalling

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Phantom Hourglass HD Edition – Sailing the 192p Seas

WAHOOOO!! With a well-timed jump over an Octorok spike trap, Phantom Hourglass has landed on the Wii U Virtual Console in Europe and Australia. Unfortunately it has not made its way to America yet, but I’m sure the fog will lift soon. There’s a lot of baddies out on the ocean so you have to plot a course carefully. Let’s get to the point, a DS game on Wii U, what is this madness? Linebeck hid in the corner, he was scared of this new experience. How do two screens work on the TV? Is it functional? Could it be amazing? I’ve just completed the game and yes, it’s pretty fucken playable. I had an absolute blast with the ship’s cannon, ahahahaha. Linebeck told me that joke I swear. The game is pretty good too. This writeup is going to explain how DS games play on Wii U, and why Phantom Hourglass itself is special.

To the SHIP!!

zeldaphlinebeck

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Twilight Princess – I’m A Wolf Now

ARROOOOOO!! This game has jumped into the spotlight with the recently announced Twilight Princess HD for Wii U so I thought it was a good time for a writeup. I started replaying this on a whim a few weeks ago and have become completely absorbed in its world. Being such a gigantic game, I haven’t done a playthrough since the Wii launch, but I was delighted to discover the game is much better than how I remember it. It’s huge and sometimes slow, but never boring. It’s such a wonderful game. Rather than being an intimidating “time sink” game, it’s been a special part of my day as I’ve slowly rediscovered this enchanting world at my own pace. The land is populated with beautiful, innocent life, but is also threatened by a dark curse. This contrast creates a sense of mystery and urgency that makes even basic travel interesting, and had my mindset permanently engaged and interested all the way to the end of the game. This writeup isn’t a traditional review, I’m going to talk a LOT about the story so it’ll be filled with spoilers, so just don’t read if you haven’t played the game. Or maybe you’re just a free spirit who doesn’t mind spoilers so go for it. I think life is too short to experience everything perfectly. Sometimes you just have to let loose and read a blog post. Like Pietriots, Twilight Princess is rich in surprises and variety and I had so much fun rediscovering all the themes and gameplay elements.

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Freedom Planet – Kick Ass and Go Fast

Freedom Planet has finally been released on the Wii U eShop around the world and I’ve sunk my teeth straight into the whole game. After a short experience with the demo I was captured by its Sonic-inspired sense of speed and platforming, but now I’ve come to appreciate it as even more than that. The game is HUGE, with levels longer than any Sonic game could dream of, and there’s a lot more of them. The biggest strength of Freedom Planet however, is how it creates a very coherent game world with a strong sense of identity that makes any comparison disappear into the background of your mind after a few levels. Freedom Planet is bursting with its own brand of energy and it feels so fresh. All its stages are unique, the characters are charming, the story is uplifting, the music is exciting, and everything has that new videogame feel that makes me so happy to be a gamer.

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The Swapper – Quadruple Standards

I’m going to make this short because The Swapper is a shit game and I don’t want to waste more energy on it. I’m very busy you see, with superior games like Witcher 3. I’ve spent the last month playing The Swapper on and off, desperately trying to find something interesting to say about it, but there’s just nothing. It’s a puzzle platformer where you create clones of yourself to solve puzzles. Yep an Indie puzzle platformer, what a refreshing addition to your game library in 2015. It’s the “I want to be a game developer” genre, but this game somehow got lucky and became a huge hit with critics. Scores from big mainstream outlets ranged from 8 to 10, and the only reason I’m writing this article is to tear that shit down and put it into perspective.

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Plague of Shadows – Erratic and Free DLC

plaguemyturn

Hee hee hee!! It’s myyyyyy turn. Throw your shovels away and bust out the beakers, because we’ve got a spell to concoct. With the Essence of every Knight I’m going to make a spell of ultimate power that will allow me to do anything I want. The bravery of these clueless Knights just makes me want to hurl, it’s so cliche. With special potions and smart movement I take advantage of their predictable Knight-like behavior. That’s it, run towards me. Right into my bombs. Too easy, AHAHA. My campaign has taken place in the shadows, and I’m not going to charge anyone or demand anything, just so I can stay underground in my laboratory and continue being brilliant. I have stealthily arrived in Shovel Knight as an automated download, but nobody cares about him. His essence is merely an ingredient in my potion. The other Knights are too stupid to complete anything, so there’s also a password to unlock me. Assuming they can read, HEE HEE!! I merely picked the sneakiest method to execute my devious plan. This is the real story, while the other Knights fight for glory and take each other out, we’re about to take control of the entire world.

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Metroid Prime – The Brightest Star

The cosmos. In the vast universe, the history of gaming is but a flash of light from a lone television. The light of a single console should be lost in space and time, but in the disc tray there is one light that burns brighter than all the rest. The light of Metroid Prime. Its legacy extends beyond the GameCube’s life and etches itself into gaming history. Today, a review of that legacy will be written.

samusgazing

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Super Mario Maker – The First Week

It’s been one week and this game has already turned my brain into coins. I’ve made a bunch of levels and played hundreds, and when I go outside I see potential Mario levels everywhere. The shape of my fence. The hills and trees beyond the farms. The crane at work lifting stacks of wood up to the flagpole, I mean conveyor belt. I’m gonna whore out some level codes in this post, but first here’s a little bit of a *dingding* writeup. What was that? Don’t *dingding* worry about it.

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Gunman Clive HD Collection – Of Jump and Shoot

Pew pew. Gunman Clive is a videogame where you jump around and shoot bad dudes, and Gunman Clive 2 is the sequel with more jumping and more shooting. Originally released on 3DS, they have now combined to form Gunman Clive HD Collection on Wii U, a huge collection of 2 games where you jump and shoot things. I’m going to make this review short and to-the-point, because that’s what Gunman Clive is all about. He doesn’t mess around with convoluted stories or filler content. This is probably the cheapest HD Collection ever made at 5 Australian dollars, and it’s the best version of each game. Instead of following the trend of other HD Collections by including new “features” like glitches, patches, crashes, muddy textures and framerate problems; this HD Collection actually makes the games better by refining the controls and polishing up the graphics for the big screen. The 5 dollar AU price point translates to 4 dollars in the US because we’re different. It’s 3 or 4 pounds / euros / whatever in Europe’s different regions. 700 rupees if you’re in Hyrule. 50,000 gems in Woolly World. 2000 coins in Inkopolis. Alright, that’s enough. I don’t know every currency and Gunman Clive is still pending classification in a few of these places. For a universal comparison, Gunman Clive HD Collection is the price of a freshly baked, choc-filled cake with strawberry topping. Except this will kill you dozens of times, instead of once. YEEEAAHHH!!!

gunmancake

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Nindies@Home – Demo Impressions

Recently Nintendo held a promotion on the Wii U eShop that let gamers sample a whole bunch of Indie games. Over the course of 3 weeks, a wave of 3 new games popped up to sample each week. Simply by playing the demo of one of these games, you are granted 15% off their retail price when they come out. Nindies@Home was Nintendo’s way of bringing some of the E3 experience into people’s homes, and helping Indie devs get more exposure. The promotion just finished in Australia and I’ve just finished playing them all. It arrived here later than America and Europe, since ratings are expensive here and demos have to go through certification. I didn’t expect the promotion to arrive here at all so it was a pleasant surprise. Nintendo AU pulled through and I’m very thankful. They have been doing a great job with everything lately. I took the opportunity to play all 9 games and offer my thoughts.

The following are demo event impressions and not representative of my final opinion.

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