Author: Grubdog

Cubemen 2 – GamePad Warfare

Cubemen 2 is an ambitious title just released on the Wii U eShop that hosts 3D strategic battles over multiple platforms and game modes. Developers 3 Sprockets and Nnooo have got together to make sure PC and Wii U gamers can do the same. This means PC and Wii U owners can not just create and share levels with each other, but also play directly online whether you’re sitting at your desk or on the couch, or even the toilet thanks to the Wii U GamePad. Just like your dinner, this game is extremely open and customisable; and while it does boast a solid campaign and single player elements, the focus is on the player and what kind of experience you want to create. There is soooooo much to say about each game mode I could flood you with a few paragraphs on each one, but I’ll just talk about my own experience so far and explain the core gameplay and features in detail.

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Siesta Fiesta – Everyone’s Invited, Paddles Provided (BYO Drinks & Tunes)

Siesta Fiesta is a game I bought without having a clue of its quality or how it would play, I read some reviews but gaming journalism has approached the point where I can’t tell the difference between a 4 and a 9 anymore when Splash or Crash gets good reviews. Everything is good or bad just because you should trust us. Anyway I had 2 motivations for diving into this mysterious fiesta. Firstly the price is great ($5.85AU) for an original 3DS game, and second is the fact that it was released here at all. Due to an inexcusably bad classifications system, a lot of small games skip Australia because developers simply can’t make the money back and I don’t blame them. I want to commend the effort of developer Mojo Bones for including Australia in their definition of “worldwide” when we perhaps don’t deserve it at the moment. OK that’s rubbish, everybody deserves videogames.

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Game & Wario – Wario’s Identity Crisis

Game & Wario is a game I’ve had for about a year and I still can’t figure out how to describe it, nor have I ever wanted to. The art style feels forced, the presentation is a mess, and half the games just aren’t very fun to play. I’ve had some fun with it and unlocked all the games but it still gives me an odd unfinished feeling after 20 hours playtime. With this being one of the free games in the new Mario Kart 8 promotion, many people have been asking about it, and for good reason because it’s a difficult game to gauge. Is it simple addictive fun like previous Wario Ware games? Are the games more fleshed out? Is it a platformer? Is it an FPS? Is there more content or less? What is content?

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Gaming Is Not Our Business

I’m sick of seeing this cycle of shit all over the web. Nintendo, Microsoft or Sony announces they lost a bunch of money or employees. Half the comments are “oh well they’re doomed snurf durf“, and the other half is “no, they’re not. here’s the math and here’s my dick.” Both sides need to shut the fuck up and realise you have nothing to do with any of this. One side looks stupid for being bitter against a piece of plastic, and the other side looks stupid creating problems and defending thin air around the plastic.

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Pokemon – The Competitive Conundrum

The past few Pokemon generations I’ve found myself thinking more about the journey and what was important to me in a Pokemon game. I still loved the games but something started fading away for me and I’ve finally been able to pinpoint exactly what it is. If you haven’t heard, a recent phenomenon called Twitch Plays Pokemon has emerged allowing people around the world to all play Pokemon at once with a rush of inputs in a text box. At its peak 100,000 people were all playing Pokemon Red together and we triumphantly beat the game over 17 days of anarchy and surprises. Catching Zapdos was a highlight for me as I was one of the people pressing A and scrolling down to the Master Ball, an unbelievable accomplishment to pull off. We all worked together and after much hard work, coordination, confusion, sacrifices and ledge jumps; Red became champion.

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Shadows of the Damned – Upgrade Your Boner

Combine the creative mind of Suda 51, the structured work ethic of Shinji Mikami, the haunting melodies of Akira Yamaoka and a big hot boner, and what do you get? A pile of steaming hot poo on the floor.

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After my misadventures with Resident Evil 6 I decided to do a bit of soul searching and got a craving to play some similar shooting games, simply because I spent so much time adapting to the style. Shadows of the Damned is a game I’ve beaten before and already loved, but after playing so many games in-between I’ve found a whole new level of appreciation for it. This game is exploding with charm, quality and more significantly; identity. Grasshopper’s games are always known for that but Suda 51 has been a bit hit-or-miss since No More Heroes in my opinion, and this game’s style might have more to do with director Massimo Guarini. With all these big names and ideas it could easily be a trainwreck but it all combines beautifully and consistently. Playing this game again awakened a part inside me I had forgotten about, an appreciation for bizarre worlds.

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5 Easy Steps – How To Fix Resident Evil

I’ve just finished playing Resident Evil 6 and after some very bad first impressions, the full game turned out pretty decent. Leon’s campaign was extremely enjoyable and the game does a lot of things right as well as wrong. The game has some interesting scenarios, amazing bosses, great dialogue (by cheesy RE standards), and even good music. One thing I really love are the environments, they are unbelievable to walk around in. The streets of China have ridiculous detail as does almost every area in the game, and there’s some nice unique scenes to enjoy and bask in. I had a lot of joyous moments simply moving the camera around and looking at all the unnecessary detail in every corner. Furthermore the gameplay is extremely robust, and the controls are a good refinement of Resident Evil 4 and 5’s strengths. I think in terms of game mechanics, this is the best Resident Evil to date.

However the the more detail you have, the bigger the mess when it all falls apart, and the things the game does wrong are big enough to kill the mood. While the shooting mechanics are good, they are abused far too much. I simply don’t like shooting games. As a Resident Evil fan, I shouldn’t have to know how to play Battlefield. I’m tired of shooting and after Chris’s campaign I need a break from the sound of gunfire and explosions for a good month. The pacing is relentless and ridiculous, if you can even call it pacing. People troll the game a lot and it’s very easy to criticise, but the significant thing about all these bad changes to the series is they are simply design choices. Resident Evil 6 could have been AMAZING if somebody stepped in and said “this is a bad idea”. In this hypothetical article, I am that guy.

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Capcom has invited me to their development offices to flip tea tables over, but I can only destroy 5 of them. These are the tables I would flip.

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Gran Turismo 6

After all the buzz about micro-transactions and the absolutely filthy excuse for a game that was Forza 5, I was hesitant to support Gran Turismo 6 after hearing that same word, “micro-transaction”. I took the plunge and bought the game last month because the allure of racing at Bathurst was too strong and I was keen to check out the new car handling physics. I’ve been playing it since it came out and I owe the developers at Polyphony Digital a giant apology for my assumptions. Gran Turismo 6 is not the devil’s next DLC scheme and the experience has been surprisingly fun and refreshing.

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2004 – Nintendo Is Doomed

2004, Nintendo is struggling with the GameCube and losing the support of third parties. Game Boy Advance is doing well but the future is in doubt as the threat of a competent Sony handheld looms. After a kiddy Zelda game (that will never get a remake) gamers were desperately clinging to the hope of a proper “realistic” Zelda. A poor marketing campaign for Super Mario Sunshine didn’t help matters, where are the traditional Mario games? The future of the system was dependent on instant megaton announcements that didn’t happen, and Resident Evil 4 which was no longer an exclusive game. E3 2004 changed everything, with the introduction of a new system and a new attitude.

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Nintendo DS was unveiled and Reggie’s confidence and the promise of a new Metroid title brought excitement to the terminally-hip crowd. However, as the dust settled, sites began taking the mickey out of Nintendo and this was the predicted downfall of the company as the unstoppable Sony showed off their new handheld, the PSP. Comparisons were inevitable and many people thought Sony would carry PS2’s success into the handheld arena. Here’s an article from IGN from just before DS and PSP launched, very clearly stating their mindset. It’s the best article I could find because they are trying to be open-minded, but it’s almost eerie how wrong they were. Here’s some quotes that highlight the apathy of DS’s unveiling.

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Nintendo: A Good Problem To Have

It’s no secret that Nintendo struggled in 2013. Despite the continued success of 3DS, Wii U sales were significantly lower than expected and profits are down. Instead of trying to cover it up by selling buildings and firing 10,000 employees, Iwata has come clean and said he needs to do better. The Blame Game has now become front-runner for GOTY 2014 with everyone becoming an expert on how the company should be run. Blah Blah Blah marketing. Hurp Durp Burp profits and IPs. Luigi should step down. There’s too much Mario. Pikmin is too weird. Iwata should be fired. The bottom line is; the world has changed and Nintendo should adapt.

So what should they turn into, this?

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Xenoblade Chronicles – Doing Music Right

Xenoblade Chronicles has been out for a few years now (depending on your region) and I still listen to the soundtrack almost daily. With almost one hundred well-composed songs brimming with heart and energy, it’s incomparable to anything else in music let alone videogames. Many RPG’s have large impressive soundtracks and it’s a huge strength of the genre, but Xenoblade pushes creativity to new heights with the variety and consistent quality throughout. There’s enough here to find something different to listen to every day and for every mood. I think music in videogames is very important, and while not every development team can form a super band of composers like Xenoblade, they should at least try. There’s no reason to let the powerful magic of music go to waste and I’m going to outline some things Xenoblade does right and why it’s the absolute pinnacle of videogame soundtracks.

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The Wonderful 101 – Can You Handle It?

UNITE UP, gamers! No, not for a fan campaign. Not for a region-locking protest. To SAVE THE WORLD from the forces of evil! Wait.. come back! I can see you all running away from the screen. The Wonderful 101 is that kind of game, it elicits of strong response whether it’s excitement or discouragement. You just have to tell people how uninterested you are because the concept slaps you in the face and demands an answer. You have a choice here, to buckle up and save the world OR keep walking and hope someone else does it. This review will find out what kind of person you are.

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