Notch is just another attention seeking liar

Yeah whatever the fuck you reckon Notch. You code in java and charge for games that barely exist as more than an idea in your head. As if you even know how to port your autism stimulator to Oculus Rift, let alone ever planned to. Christ, Minecraft in VR, it’d be the eternal nightmare.

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Pokemon – The Competitive Conundrum

The past few Pokemon generations I’ve found myself thinking more and about the journey and what was important to me in a Pokemon game. I still loved the games but something started fading away for me and I’ve finally been able to pinpoint exactly what it is. If you haven’t heard, a recent phenomenon called Twitch Plays Pokemon has emerged allowing people around the world to all play Pokemon at once with a rush of inputs in a text box. At its peak 100,000 people were all playing Pokemon Red together and we triumphantly beat the game over 17 days of anarchy and surprises. Catching Zapdos was a highlight for me as I was one of the people pressing A and scrolling down to the Master Ball, an unbelievable accomplishment to pull off. We all worked together and after much hard work, coordination, confusion, sacrifices and ledge jumps; Red became champion.

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Shadows of the Damned – Upgrade Your Boner

Combine the creative mind of Suda 51, the structured work ethic of Shinji Mikami, the haunting melodies of Akira Yamaoka and a big hot boner, and what do you get? A pile of steaming hot poo on the floor.

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After my misadventures with Resident Evil 6 I decided to do a bit of soul searching and got a craving to play some similar shooting games, simply because I spent so much time adapting to the style. Shadows of the Damned is a game I’ve beaten before and already loved, but after playing so many games in-between I’ve found a whole new level of appreciation for it. This game is exploding with charm, quality and more significantly; identity. Grasshopper’s games are always known for that but Suda 51 has been a bit hit-or-miss since No More Heroes in my opinion, and this game’s style might have more to do with director Massimo Guarini. With all these big names and ideas it could easily be a trainwreck but it all combines beautifully and consistently. Playing this game again awakened a part inside me I had forgotten about, an appreciation for bizarre worlds.

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F***heads – Final Strategy

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5 Easy Steps – How To Fix Resident Evil

I’ve just finished playing Resident Evil 6 and after some very bad first impressions, the full game turned out pretty decent. Leon’s campaign was extremely enjoyable and the game does a lot of things right as well as wrong. The game has some interesting scenarios, amazing bosses, great dialogue (by cheesy RE standards), and even good music. One thing I really love are the environments, they are unbelievable to walk around in. The streets of China have ridiculous detail as does almost every area in the game, and there’s some nice unique scenes to enjoy and bask in. I had a lot of joyous moments simply moving the camera around and looking at all the unnecessary detail in every corner. Furthermore the gameplay is extremely robust, and the controls are a good refinement of Resident Evil 4 and 5′s strengths. I think in terms of game mechanics, this is the best Resident Evil to date.

However the the more detail you have, the bigger the mess when it all falls apart, and the things the game does wrong are big enough to kill the mood. While the shooting mechanics are good, they are abused far too much. I simply don’t like shooting games. As a Resident Evil fan, I shouldn’t have to know how to play Battlefield. I’m tired of shooting and after Chris’s campaign I need a break from the sound of gunfire and explosions for a good month. The pacing is relentless and ridiculous, if you can even call it pacing. People troll the game a lot and it’s very easy to criticise, but the significant thing about all these bad changes to the series is they are simply design choices. Resident Evil 6 could have been AMAZING if somebody stepped in and said “this is a bad idea”. In this hypothetical article, I am that guy.

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Capcom has invited me to their development offices to flip tea tables over, but I can only destroy 5 of them. These are the tables I would flip.

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Positive NinPal – The Twin Snakes

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WIN WITH PIETRIOTS!

Pietriots are really bad at social media. We have a Facebook page but don’t know what to do with it. So I decided to run a contest to promote it! Is this how you social media?
Anyway if you want to win a copy of Civ V + expansions then like our Facebook page and comment for a chance to win! At the time of writing only 17 people like our Facebook page and like 8 of them write for the site so your chances are pretty good!

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