Depressing Realities Ruining My Enjoyment Of Gaming

Another one?!

That’s right folks, are you ready for another round of depressing realities in this world of gaming? I hope so! Since you are all waiting for PS4’s ‘greatness’ to occur in 2015 or later, and what other excuse third parties are trying to find on not support the WiiU, you can read this to pass the time. Continue reading

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Positive NinPal – MARIO KRAT 7.9

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Share your dong on Mario Krat TV.

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Game & Wario – Wario’s Identity Crisis

Game & Wario is a game I’ve had for about a year and I still can’t figure out how to describe it, nor have I ever wanted to. The art style feels forced, the presentation is a mess, and half the games just aren’t very fun to play. I’ve had some fun with it and unlocked all the games but it still gives me an odd unfinished feeling after 20 hours playtime. With this being one of the free games in the new Mario Kart 8 promotion, many people have been asking about it, and for good reason because it’s a difficult game to gauge. Is it simple addictive fun like previous Wario Ware games? Are the games more fleshed out? Is it a platformer? Is it an FPS? Is there more content or less? What is content?

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Gaming Is Not Our Business

I’m sick of seeing this cycle of shit all over the web. Nintendo, Microsoft or Sony announces they lost a bunch of money or employees. Half the comments are “oh well they’re doomed snurf durf“, and the other half is “no, they’re not. here’s the math and here’s my dick.” Both sides need to shut the fuck up and realise you have nothing to do with any of this. One side looks stupid for being bitter against a piece of plastic, and the other side looks stupid creating problems and defending thin air around the plastic.

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Notch is just another attention seeking liar

Yeah whatever the fuck you reckon Notch. You code in java and charge for games that barely exist as more than an idea in your head. As if you even know how to port your autism stimulator to Oculus Rift, let alone ever planned to. Christ, Minecraft in VR, it’d be the eternal nightmare.

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Pokemon – The Competitive Conundrum

The past few Pokemon generations I’ve found myself thinking more about the journey and what was important to me in a Pokemon game. I still loved the games but something started fading away for me and I’ve finally been able to pinpoint exactly what it is. If you haven’t heard, a recent phenomenon called Twitch Plays Pokemon has emerged allowing people around the world to all play Pokemon at once with a rush of inputs in a text box. At its peak 100,000 people were all playing Pokemon Red together and we triumphantly beat the game over 17 days of anarchy and surprises. Catching Zapdos was a highlight for me as I was one of the people pressing A and scrolling down to the Master Ball, an unbelievable accomplishment to pull off. We all worked together and after much hard work, coordination, confusion, sacrifices and ledge jumps; Red became champion.

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Posted in Features, Real Gameplay | Tagged , | 19 Comments

Shadows of the Damned – Upgrade Your Boner

Combine the creative mind of Suda 51, the structured work ethic of Shinji Mikami, the haunting melodies of Akira Yamaoka and a big hot boner, and what do you get? A pile of steaming hot poo on the floor.

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After my misadventures with Resident Evil 6 I decided to do a bit of soul searching and got a craving to play some similar shooting games, simply because I spent so much time adapting to the style. Shadows of the Damned is a game I’ve beaten before and already loved, but after playing so many games in-between I’ve found a whole new level of appreciation for it. This game is exploding with charm, quality and more significantly; identity. Grasshopper’s games are always known for that but Suda 51 has been a bit hit-or-miss since No More Heroes in my opinion, and this game’s style might have more to do with director Massimo Guarini. With all these big names and ideas it could easily be a trainwreck but it all combines beautifully and consistently. Playing this game again awakened a part inside me I had forgotten about, an appreciation for bizarre worlds.

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