Captain Toad – A Tale of Bravery

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Metroid Fusion – Review Authorised

I’ve just finished a playthrough of Metroid Fusion on Wii U and there’s a lot I want to say about it. I remember it fondly as my first Metroid game in 2002. The dark unstable black hole that is the classic GBA screen, a perfect window to the man-made prison that is Metroid Fusion’s research station. Gazing into that screen with a burning lamp on my ear made me feel like I was out in space, in hostile territory. Fast forward to 2015 and I still love this game, it’s aged very well graphically and is fantastic to play on Wii U. Unfortunately, a lot of the design choices don’t fly with me anymore after experiencing the good stuff. Super Metroid, Metroid Prime 1, 2 and Zero Mission are what I would consider perfect games, and happen to highlight a lot of Fusion’s flaws just by existing and being their own beautiful selves. The biggest flaw being a slap in the face right at the start of the game.


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Bioshock – Late to the Rapture

I’ve had this game for a couple of years and never thought about playing it. The box is bland, it’s an FPS, and muddy brown shooters do not excite me; almost all Xbox 360 shooters I’ve played have been terrible. Nothing personal against the game, but that’s how my shallow mind worked for the last few years. It was one of those “one day” games that really means “never” because I only play what excites me. What finally piqued my interest was a friend talking about this game as if it was more than a shooter. Could it be, a fun game on the shelf right in front of me? Lo and Behold, it’s fucking amazing. Bioshock is an extremely well crafted game with a heavy, purposeful atmosphere that actually makes the Unreal Engine seem legitimately titled. I beat the game a few days ago and I’m still thinking about it, it’s one of those games that sticks with you. While my head is still putting itself back together in the depths of Rapture, allow me to drag you down with me and capture the essence of Bioshock like a true artist.


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Speedrunning: An Amateur Perspective

Awesome Games Done Quick 2014 was my first exposure to the speedrunning community. I saw the hashtag trending on Twitter and wondered what all the fuss was about. Twitch? Streaming? Glitches? Kill The Animals? It was all a bit disturbing and alien. One night I decided to blindly tune in to the livestream, I can’t remember why but a game I was familiar with must have been trending. It’s quite a plunge sometimes to look into something you don’t understand, but I opened the stream and almost instantly I got it. A group of gamers in a room together doing what they do best, playing! I could hear that warm love for gaming in the commentary, I could see it in the intense gameplay, and I could feel it as the room got hyped for a good run. These are people who are only there because they play so much, and truly respect videogames to the point of dedicating their lives to them.


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Gamers, stop being shit and buy a Wii U

It’s been a while since I’ve done a rant, which means a lot of rage has built up. I’m going to deliver it to you right now in the form of a reality check on the state of the gaming industry. It’s gotten to such a bad state in the past few years I’ve just avoided talking or thinking about it and happily played my games. Iwata was right in 2000-2004 about graphics not being important. In 2015 he’s still right. He’s been right every time he’s opened his mouth and prophetised games declining in value (aka the end of the world) which IS NOW UPON US.


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Metroid: Zero Mission – The Last 2D Metroid Is In Captivity

I’ve been on a massive Metroid binge lately, playing through the Trilogy again on Wii U with glorious Wiimote controls, then revisiting Super Metroid which I have already written a piece on. Metroid: Zero Mission is a game I’ve had my eye on for a while because it’s the only Metroid I hadn’t played. It came out on the Japanese Virtual Console over a year ago so I thought surely, it can’t be far way. How hard is it to translate a Metroid game? Months passed, and sarcastic tweets were muttered into oblivious PR accounts, as Nintendo missed so many chances to release this game. The game had passed the Australian ratings system gauntlet which is usually the hardest step, but there was just no sign of Nintendo caring about it. Eventually I gave up, and this was the game that made me stop looking at eShop updates. I decided life was too short to live by a release schedule and in retrospect I have to thank Zero Mission for liberating me.

Anyway, the game finally came out and hilariously enough I didn’t have money for it. The week it came out I was already living off beans and soup, so I just had to laugh and play other Metroid games. Now that my life is on track I’ve got it, and was it worth the wait? Fuck no, but it’s an absolutely fantastic game.


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Child of Light – Review In Rhyme

A game that’s written
in constant rhyme
feels quite different
to any other title

It’s alright to groan
at this style of review
but it helps set the tone
for what you’re getting into

An Ubisoft game
that isn’t shit,
Child of Light
just might be it!


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